What's In A Name?
(How to decide if you
should take on his moniker,
keep your own...or do something in between)
Are
you planning to love, honor, cherish...and take his name? Here are a few things
to consider before making the big switch.
On The Job
Worried about the confusion a name change might
cause at work? If you feel strongly that your maiden name is tied in
with your professional identity then you might opt not to make the
change. Or, you could go the Clark Kent route and keep one identity by
day (your maiden name) and another by night (your married name).
The third option is to just go
ahead and change it. Of course, until your new moniker really sinks in, people
will probably forget and continue to use your maiden name, at least for a while.
(But don’t worry—they’ll catch on!)
Family Matters
If you decide to keep your name and you plan to have
children someday, how will you feel about having a different last name
from the rest of your crew? If this would bother you, and changing your
name would create a stronger sense of family for you, then go for it.
However, if you opt to keep your maiden name, rest assured that
households with two last names are quite common these days.
Options Galore
Consider all your choices. You can:
- Pass your maiden name on. If you decide to
switch, use your maiden name as your first child’s middle name.
- Have it all. Use a hyphen to link your name
with your hubby’s.
- Call in a sub. Take the traditional path,
but use your maiden name as your middle name.
- Get creative. Try combining part of your
last name with part of his and see what come up with.
- Be ultra-modern. It might be a long shot,
but what if your husband took your last name? It couldn’t hurt to ask.
Making It Legit
If you decide to nab your husband’s name, saying ”I
do” does not make it official. First you have to receive your certified
certificate of marriage registration in the mail. This usually takes
about two weeks after the wedding to arrive. A certificate of marriage
registration is considered a legal document, and you can use it to
change your name.
If you opt for something a little
different, like creating a new last name, you will most likely have to fill out
a Name Change Packet in addition to an Application to Marry.
Unfortunately it’s not such a
modern world out there and a certificate of marriage registration usually just
gives you the right to change your name to your husband’s. Once you complete the
additional paperwork, a judge will decide whether or not to grant your name
change, and issue a Final Judgment of Name Change.
This article originally appeared
here.
The Name-Change Game
(Here are the rules for getting your postmarital moniker set)
When
you were junior high, did you ever try signing your first name with the
last name of that guy you had a crush on? In real life, taking on a new
married name isn't quite so simple. It takes organization,
determination...and plenty of patience.
"It's not as clear-cut as you might think," says Chicago lawyer Sandra
Murphy, a former president of the American Academy of Matrimonial
Lawyers who has been practicing for more than 25 years. "Every place has
different requirements of how to change. There's no formal time
limit-although if you've been married ten years and then suddenly decide
to change your name, people might find it a little weird."
The magic document that allows you to change your name is a completed,
certified marriage license-something that's only available after the
ceremony. So you can't start officially altering your moniker before the
big day. Remember to make all your honeymoon reservations in your
original name, since that name will be on your passport, driver's
license and credit card.
You can start getting the word out ahead of time to friends and family
(plenty of people will be asking you about it during bridal showers and
at the reception). Let your office know, so you'll have new business
cards and a new e-mail address when you get back from your honeymoon.
You can also order cards engraved with your new married name to send out
as thank-you notes-a great way to spread the news to everyone who was
involved in the wedding.
The key to a successful, stress-free name change is to take it in
steps—and in the right order:
STEP 1: Lay Your Hands on That License.
After the wedding, your certified license will either be mailed to
you, or you'll have to pick it up at a government office (usually the
same place you applied for the license). Ask your officiant how it works
in your state, or check out About.com's marriage site. Make a stack of
photocopies, because you'll be asked to show this "proof of marriage"
over and over.
STEP 2: Settle Up with Social Security.
"Once you've got the Social Security card, everything flows from
there," Murphy says. This part's easy: All you have to do is fill out a
simple form, hand over your old card, and a new one will be mailed to
you within two weeks. Download the form from
Social Security's Web site, or call
800-772-1213 to have one mailed to you.
STEP 3: Tackle Money Matters
Now that Social Security knows about the all-new you, any money you
earn should be in that new name. Meet with Human Resources at work to
change the name on your paycheck, health insurance, office ID card and
401K. Then go to your bank to start the name-change process
there-because the name on your paycheck should match the name on your
bank account. Take out extra cash in advance, just in case of
bureaucratic mix-ups.
STEP 4: Figure Out Your Finances
Once the bank account is changed (and you've ordered new checks),
get on the phone to your credit card company, department stores where
you have charge cards, and any place you have investments. Usually you
can make changes by mail, by sending in a copy of that all-important
license. Next, inform any place you owe money (car loan, student loan,
etc.). And while you're figuring out that car loan, take care of your
car insurance, too.
STEP 5: Spread the Word
When you get a new e-mail address at work, send out a quick message
to all your contacts (keep it professional, not giddy) and change the
voice mail on your telephone to include a brief explanation of the new
name. Sign thank-you notes with your new name or even jot a quick note
on postcards-then send one to everyone on your wedding guest list. (If
you have a fall wedding, you can do this with holiday cards.)
STEP 6: Tackle the B-List (whenever)
For the telephone company and other utilities, wait until you get
your next bill, then send in a note and a copy of your license along
with your payment. Then you can work your way through the rest of the
low-priority list: voter registration, passport, magazine subscriptions,
alumni associations. And even if you're not an organizational goddess,
never fear. It's been almost a year since I got married...and my
video-rental card is still in my maiden name.
This article originally appeared
here.
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