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Selecting the music for your wedding dances can be a source of considerable
anxiety. Whether you plan to hire a band or have a DJ provide the music, you
want to be sure the songs you pick for those important first dances are
meaningful yet unique. For many couples, the decision about their first dance as
a couple is easy: they simply select “their song.” More difficult is
selecting the songs for the bride’s dance with her father and the groom’s
dance with his mother.
Ideally, the song selected for each dance reflects the essential character of
the relationship between that parent and child. Some very sentimental songs
may not be appropriate if the bride does not have a close relationship with her
father. For brides who were raised by a stepfather and who will be dancing with
him at this special moment, a very traditional father/daughter song might not
feel right. On the other hand, an upbeat, fun song may seem inappropriate to a
bride who has always been “Daddy’s little girl.”
In most cases, the dances will be to a ballad or down tempo song. If you
and your parents love to rock and roll, don’t hesitate to pick something with
a livelier beat. You don’t want to embarrass your parent with a song he or she
isn’t prepared to dance to, so you’re best off selecting a number that
requires nothing more sophisticated that a simple box step.
Here are some song titles, which a bride might wish to consider for that special
tribute to her father:
- “Isn’t She Lovely” by Stevie Wonder
- “Butterfly Kisses” by Bob Carlisle
- “Daddy’s Little Girl” by Kippi Brannon
- “Sunrise Sunset” (from “Fiddler on the Roof”)
- “Because You Loved Me” by Celine Dion
- “Through the Years” by Kenny Rogers
- “Wind Beneath My Wings” by Bette Midler
- “My Girl” by The Temptations
- “The Way You Look Tonight” by Frank Sinatra
- “Three Times A Lady” by the Commodores
- “Father’s Eyes” by Amy Grant
Depending on your relationship, you might consider something more personal or
dramatic. One bride whose father triumphed over illness to walk her down the
aisle selected Mariah Carey’s “Hero” as a tribute to her courageous
father.
The groom’s dance with his mother is usually a very touching moment. Many
mothers-of-the-groom (and even a few grooms) have been known to shed a tear
during this dance.
Popular titles for the groom and his mother to dance to include:
- “A Song for My Son” by Mikki Vierick
- “What A Wonderful World” by Louis Armstrong
- “You Decorated My Life” by Kenny Rogers
- “Unforgettable” by Nat King Cole, or newer version by Natalie Cole and
Nat King Cole
- “In My Life” by The Beatles
- “Blessed” by Elton John
- “I Wish You Love” by Natalie Cole
- “In This Life” by Bette Midler
- “I Am Your Child” by Barry Manilow
Your bandleader or DJ will undoubtedly have additional suggestions.
When you make your selection, consider that in the case of a live band, their
performance is likely to be better if they are familiar with the material.
Still, you should not hesitate to ask that they prepare the song of your choice.
You may be expected to cover the cost of the musical charts.
If a deejay will be providing the song, make sure his or her version of the
song is the one you had in mind. Many of these popular titles have been
recorded a number of times by different artists. In fact, there may be more than
one song with that same title. If it’s important to you to have a particular
version of the song, be specific with your DJ.
Most of these songs run between 3 and 4 minutes in length. That may not
sound like a long time, but in the context of your reception events, it may seem
dreadfully long. A 3-4 minute dance of the bride and her father, then another
3-4 minute dance of the groom and his mother may slow the celebratory momentum
of the event. Because of this, some brides and grooms opt instead to pick a
single song that is “gender neutral” and pay tribute to both the
bride’s father and the groom’s mother, and the two dances are simultaneous.
Especially appropriate for this kind of shared tribute are songs like Nat King
Cole’s “Unforgettable,” Bette Midler’s “Wind Beneath My Wings,” and
Celine Dion’s “Because You Loved Me.”
Whichever song you choose, be sure it reflects your special relationship with
your parent. You may even want to ask your parents if they have a request for a
specific song they would like to dance with you. After the big event, consider
giving your parent a recording of the song to commemorate that special moment at
the reception. It’s a tribute they’ll treasure through the years.
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