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Here's the skinny on what the flower girl does, where she stands, and who
makes sure she gets down the aisle with all her clothes on.
If you're going to have a flower girl in your ceremony, remember:
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Most baby brides aren't any older than 8 or 9. If you have an older girl
whom you want included in the wedding, make them a junior bridesmaid
instead.
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Flower girls are placed either before the maid of honor, or right before
the bride in the procession. Sometimes the flower girl and the ring bearer
walk down the aisle together.
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The flower girl does not have to wear a mini bride's dress (even though
some bridal gowns come with them), but may wear a pretty dress of her own
that she can use again after the wedding.
The "cute" factor. Since the Victorian era, children have
been used in the wedding party, mostly for the guests to ooh and ahh over. The
reason to have a flower girl is because they're so doggone cute, and (whether
you want them to or not) will sometimes provide a little comic relief. If you
are not having children at your wedding, or don't wish to have a flower girl, it
is certainly not a necessity.
Petal toss. Symbolically, the flower girl scatters rose petals for the
bride to walk on as a token of beauty. Some say the rose petals are tossed as a
symbol of the bride's walking down the path of a new life as well.
Where does she sit? As far as having them stand with the wedding party
at the altar, most flower girls and ring bearers are too young to stand still
through an entire ceremony. It's probably best to have their parents seated up
near the front, so after their walk, they can go straight to sit with Mom and
Dad.
Who watches them before we begin? There are several ways to handle
this delicate situation. You may ask the maid of honor or one of the bridesmaids
to hold on to her until her big moment arrives, especially if one of them is
related to the little girl. You can also ask one of the parents to wait in the
back with her, but that means they will either miss a portion of the ceremony or
will have to walk in after it's already begun.
The receiving line. Usually the flower girl is not required to stand
in the receiving line. Her only other "duties" after her brilliant
tossing technique is to hang around for pictures.
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