Here’s
everything your ushers need to know for the big day, from their job description
to guest-seating etiquette. You might want to print this out and give a copy to
each of your ushers.
All ushers should be at the location about 45-60 minutes before the ceremony
will begin. Upon their arrival, they should put on their boutonnieres if they
haven’t already. Boutonnieres can be tricky to put on (especially for nervous
fingers) so, it’s a good idea to have someone there to help them.
Ushers should smile, be friendly, and greet the guests as they escort them to
their seats.
Traditionally, the usher offers his right arm to the woman (the oldest woman
if a group or family is being escorted). Another option: the ushers can walk the
guests to their seats rather than offering their arm.
Family and friends of the bride are seated on the left side of the aisle
(facing the altar) and the groom’s family and friends on the right. If one
side of the church becomes more full than the other, the ushers should begin
seating guests on the other side.
Based on the guest list, you should have a good idea of how many to expect on
both sides. If you know one side of the family will have more guests, then
instruct your ushers ahead of time to "fill in" the more empty side.
After all the guests are seated, the parents of the groom are seated.
Sometimes the groom’s mother is escorted by the groom. Next the mother of the
bride is escorted in, sometimes by the best man or the head usher.
The first pews are reserved for immediate family of the bride and groom, and
the parents sit in the front pew. Be sure to instruct the family and the ushers
ahead of time on who should be sitting where, especially when it comes to
divorced parents. If the parents are divorced, the father is seated in the row
behind, or if the parents get along well they can be seated in the same pew.
Once the groom and best man are in place at the altar the ceremony is ready
to begin.
After the ceremony is completed and the wedding party has recessed, two
ushers will escort the mothers back down the aisle. Some mothers prefer to walk
back with their husband - in this case, the usher will simply lead the couple
out.
Then, the ushers will help escort or direct the rest of the guests out of the
church beginning with the front pews and working their way back.
Alternative: Some couples now go back down the aisle and release each pew after
greeting their guests, in lieu of a receiving line.