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The purpose of a receiving line
is to allow the hosts and other members of your bridal party to officially
welcome and be introduced to all your guests. Although some couples, and
sometimes their parents, eschew the idea of a receiving line because of its
formality and the time it takes for the guests to pass along it, a receiving
line is the only way to guarantee that everyone is personally welcomed, albeit
briefly. The alternative of planning to welcome all your guests individually
throughout your reception often does not happen in practice leaving some guests
unwelcome. Therefore, unless you have few guests, a receiving line is highly
recommended.
Receiving lines have been becoming shorter in
recent years, when they aren't skipped altogether in favor of "doing the
tables." While it's still important that the hosts and guests of honor
greet every guest, a relatively short receiving line is more fun for everyone
and allows you to enjoy the party sooner.
The absolute minimum receiving line,
acceptable only when the bride and groom are hosting their own wedding, is just
the bride and groom. The bride stands to the groom's right. They can also
include others if they like, as outlined below.
The next most minimal line, used when only the
bride's parents were involved in hosting the wedding, is the bride's mother plus
the bride and groom. The bride's mother is first in line, followed by the bride
and then the groom. If the bride's father also wishes to be in line, he stands
after the bride's mother and before the bride.
If both sets of parents were involved in hosting-or otherwise feel they ought to
be in the receiving line-the bride's parents stand first, then the groom's
parents, then the bride, then the groom.
Should there be step-parents involved, you may arrange them in any way that
maintains civility. It is even okay to put some of the parents after the bride
and groom. Guests really are not sticklers about these things as long as the
line is neat and even, so they can tell who they should shake hands with.
It is also acceptable to include the maid of
honor and the bridesmaids in the receiving line. In recent years, some couples
have included only the maid of honor and best man, sending the other attendants
off to help get the party going. Ushers or groomsmen are almost never included
in the receiving line, and the best man rarely is.
A receiving line with two or three sets of parents, a maid of honor, and four
bridesmaids may be more than most guests will find enjoyable. What could a guest
say to a bridesmaid whose name they don't know? In most cases, include parents
who want to be included, but let the attendants skip the line.
Regarding the head table, there are two ways to arrange the seating. You can put
all the women on the bride's side and all the men on the groom's side, with the
maid of honor nearest the bride and the best man nearest the groom. (The other
four on each side are seated in any way that's convenient-they can sit in their
order from the ceremony or not, as you please.)
It's considered more elegant and traditional, however, to alternate men and
women at the head table. The bride sits to the groom's right, with the best man
on her right. The maid of honor sits to the groom's left. Beyond the best man
are a bridesmaid, an usher, another bridesmaid, and another usher. Beyond the
maid of honor, the order is usher, bridesmaid, usher, bridesmaid. Which
bridesmaids and ushers sit to which side is up to you. If you want the first
bridesmaid in the processional to sit at the far end of the groom's side, with
her matching usher at the far end of the bride's side, you can do that, but it's
not at all necessary. If there are married or dating couples among your
attendants, go ahead and seat them together.
A popular alternative to the formal head table is the "sweetheart
table" for the newly married couple, with their attendants seated
throughout the hall with their friends or significant others. The sweetheart
table gives the bride and groom somewhere to stop, breathe, and spend a minute
together before plunging back into the festivities.
Remember: the most important thing is that
your family and guests are comfortable and have a good time!
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